Vampire Cookies

April 4, 2009 at 7:13 am (Baking, Shenanigans) (, , , , , )

I am not as weird as that title suggests.

Today (Friday, not literally today) was very…hectic. I needed something to cheer me up.
So! I put on a vampire movie marathon (Underworld, Dracula 2000, Twilight, Interview with the Vampire, and Van Helsing) and baked Vampire Cookies.

However, I am trying to diet. So I used a relatively less fattening recipe.
(I got the idea from this site. Same recipe, but a slightly different method.)

You Will Need:

  • ¾ cup substitute butter [or butter, or shortening (for whiter cookies)]
  • ¾ cup Splenda [or 1/2 cup sugar]
  • ¼ cup egg substitute [or 1 large egg]
  • ½ teaspoon of vanilla extract
  • 1/8 teaspoon of almond extract
  • 1 ½ cups of all-purpose flour
    [Note: I usually use wheat flour as opposed to all-purpose, but if you want the cookies to turn out white, all purpose is needed. The cookies don’t have to be white, though. You could even make them chocolate, if you wanted.]
  • ¼ teaspoon of salt
  • ~½ cup of sugar-free red jam [raspberry/strawberry] or Maraschino cherry juice.
  • ~2 tablespoons warm water or ~2 tablespoons Splenda.
  • A rolling pin, round cookie cutter, and flour for the rolling area.

What To Do:


Jelly: Mix the jam and warm water, to make a somewhat thin syrup. Keep it out, at room temperature.
Cherry juice: Mix with Splenda to make it thicker, but still runny. Put it in the fridge until ready to use.


  1. In a large bowl, cream together butter [substitute] and Splenda until light.
  2. Beat in egg [substitute] and extracts.
  3. Add flour and salt to the bowl, and mix them into the butter-Splenda mixture at low speed until dough is just combined.
  4. Wrap dough in plastic wrap and refrigerate for about 1 hour.
  5. Preheat oven to 325°
  6. Divide the dough into halves, and put one half back in the fridge.
  7. Roll the dough out until it is about ½ inch thick.
  8. Use cookie cutter to make circles. (Mine were 2 inches.)
  9. Place circles on baking pan(s).
  10. Use your thumb (or a tea spoon if you’d rather not use your thumb) to make a small well into the center of each circle.
  11. Spoon a little of the jelly syrup or cherry syrup into the well.
  12. Place another dough circle on top, and press edges to seal the cookie shut.
  13. Use a toothpick or fork to make two, small holes (the vampire bites) into the top.
  14. Bake 10 to 12 minutes, until cookies are set.
  15. Cool for about 5 minutes, then redefine the holes. Draw blood trickle if you so desire.

I also made Shirley Temples. Tonight was very red.


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March 6, 2009 at 9:52 am (Uncategorized) (, , , , )

When I was little, my Mother used to drag us out to pick blueberries by the bushel. It would be hot, and sandy, and sunny, and one of us–usually Matt–would whine and complain until she got frustrated enough to take us all back to that beat up gray mini-van. I remember being in a little sun dress, and always wearing my Father’s straw hat. I remember sneaking a few into my mouth, tasting like slightly-sweetened dirt. We’d take them home and fill the kitchen sink with them to rinse them off, then put them into labeled Ziploc bags to be frozen, and forgotten about.

Until the winter, when she would remember that there were a dozen bags of blueberries frozen solid in the freezer in the basement. Then there’d be muffins, and pancakes, and sugared blueberries in our cheerios.

Last time I went to the grocery, I saw these bags of frozen blueberries, and couldn’t resist buying them. I put them in my cereal; mixed them with pomegranate seeds and dusted the mixture with Splenda; mixed them into what I had left of Vanilla Silk and froze the mixture. Very wistful. I can’t seem to make pancakes (I think I’m too impatient) but tonight, I decided to make muffins.

Muffin Recipe:


  • 2 cups whole-wheat flour
  • ¼ cup margarine
  • ½ cup Splenda
  • 1 Egg
  • 2 tea spoons baking powder
  • 1 tsp lemon juice
  • ¼ tsp salt
  • 1  cups frozen blue berries
  • 1 cup vanilla soy milk
  • ½ cup blueberries, thawed, mixed with Splenda to create thin syrup

  1. Preheat oven to 400 degrees and lightly grease a muffin pan. I used Pam Baking spray, with flour.
  2. In a large bowl, combine the flour, Splenda, baking powder and salt.
  3. Add the soy milk, margarine, egg and lemon juice, and thawed blueberry/syrup, and stir until mixed.
  4. Gently add the blueberries.
  5. Spoon the batter in to the muffin pan, filling each cup about 2/3 full.
  6. Bake for 20-25 minutes, until muffins are golden brown.

Blueberry-pomegranate juice is also delicious. I had purchased the pomegranates in October, scooped the seeds out, and froze them. I basically just squish and strain the berries and seeds with my fingers, but this is because I don’t have a blender and only make a glass at a time.  If you try this and find it to be too tart, try adding a little apple juice  or ginger ale to it. I have also done this with the pomegranate seeds and strawberries.

Blood Orange Juice is also quite good, but almost overwhelmingly sweet, and I made a nigh-gorey mess in my sink. I seem to gain sustenance primarily from liquids…

I usually go to a place called Red Bank to walk around in the late afternoon. It runs along the oh-so-scenic Delaware River, and is actually pretty sketchy in the off-season. Today, I met up with my cousin at a local health facility that also runs along the Delaware, and is notably less sketchy–street lamps, people in little carts patrolling, a lot of people. I found it strange that a matter of maybe 2 miles could make such a difference.

The Hex goes well…is currently about the size of an average umbrella around, 2½ feet from point to point. It is mostly navy blue, and there are several spots where the color changes a few stitches away from the completetion of the round. It irks me, so this will likely be given away.

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